2008-07-01

Cheesecake Factory, Race, and Marriage Part 2

First let me get my militancy out of the way:



I just love Saul Williams, I forgot to add him to my "WTF? You think he's hot?!?!?!?!?!" list.

Anyhoo.......

So my husband broke his rule of not reading my blog, because he saw me typing the blog up, he wasn't so upset with the blog itself, but the comments. He feels he isn't naive at all, just willing to give the benefit of the doubt. He feels that he as a white male has this burden of proving he isn't racist, which he understands why, but maybe that is why he is willing to do such a thing, as he doesn't see himself as racist (I don't see him as racist either), but he like me are both naive in the ways of what it is like to be of the opposite race, we can't experience that, even if we wanted to. He was also willing to say he wasn't denying it wasn't racially motivated, he just wanted to give people the benefit of the doubt. He feels I was angry for no reason though, but that has everything to do with my having a quick temper in general. I think he wants to see the good in people, and he thinks sometimes I see the bad in people, which I do to an extent. I am just not trusting of people, but that is just how I am.

I mentioned this in the comments section of the last post, my husband does know what it is like to be a minority somewhat, as he spent some time being the "only one" in schools that were predominantly black and hispanic, even when we met in college, the majority of people he was around were black. I've never thought him to be uncomfortable around my family, he was able to woo my parents, and he just isn't focused on race. This can be a good thing and a bad thing. Being around a person like me, I enjoy having discussions on race and politics, so often I discuss it here on this blog. My husband did point out I talk about race a lot, and that I seem to obsess over it, as in real life we never discuss race or rarely if ever politics. We usually discuss television and what is going on at work or with family and friends, etc.

All in all, he just wanted to make sure I knew he would stand up for me if he felt I was being discriminated against, but I think my issue would still be would he be able to recognize it, after all our experiences are vastly different.