2008-12-15

Black Female Sexuality



Black women seem to be some of the most sexual repressed women. We tend to look down on doing things considered sexy, and it seems that many times our goals is to be as asexual as possible.

Talking about sex is a bad thing. Wearing "revealing" clothing is considered a bad thing. Having sex outside the missionary position is considered whorish.

We tend to look at things in black and white, instead of grey. You can't be smart, well adjusted, and celebrate your sexuality. It seems to be a conflict of interest for many.

I guess I attribute black female repression to two things; religion and stereotypes.

Religion plays a big part in the black community. We are supposed to wait until marriage. Sex is for procreation, not recreation. To some sex is for the sole purpose of the man, as women are thought to not enjoy sex. Anything outside this norm is somewhat shunned. We are scared to be viewed as whores, which leads me to stereotypes.

Black women have a complex history of stereotypes when it comes to sexuality. We are on hand, mammies, non sexual women whose sole purpose is to care for others or mannish, as we are considered the polar opposite of feminine. On the other hand we are sex obsessed Jezebels, willing and able to have sex with any and everyone. We don't seem to have an issue with being considered asexual as that is a safe stereotype, but to display any trace of sexuality is turned into a negative. The percentage of black women who actually booty shake, I am assuming is very small and not the norm, but of the women who do partake in booty shaking we have cast the blame for the ills and stereotypes of black women, stereotypes that have existed for centuries prior to hip hop and strip clubs. We also need to look at how many times we assume "freaky stuff" is done by white people. We like to think they are sexually depraved. The stereotype of white women who dated black men was they were willing to do any and everything that black women wouldn't do.

I in this post am not suggesting that we should all go out and purchase tube tops and miniskirts, but at the same time, I don't think that we should hide our sexuality for fear of fulfilling a stereotype, or that we should downplay one aspect of ourselves to play up another. Intelligence is not determined by what we wear, and we can be multi-faceted and be both sexy and intelligent.